Category Archives: WORKED UNTIL BROKE

UNKNOWN INCIDENT WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"picture is faulty like in the picture"

October 25, 2011 – 10:45 am

BSOD

“This is a Samsung LCD TV with a defective screen. I’ve had it for about 3 years.”

And you’ve not thought of replacing it/getting it fixed in all that time?

“The sound works but the picture is faulty like in the picture.”

Sorry, which picture is faulty? The picture (pictured), or the picture of the picture?

“I suppose someone might want to use it for parts or something so I’m putting it up here.”

“Or something”.
That just about encompasses anything doesn’t it?
From someone unhinged enough to want a screen ominously displaying an almost otherworldly blue glow so they can talk to God/aliens/their late Aunty Doreen (or the alien god “Lateantidoreen”, I suppose), to people confused by the idea of blue movies and pretty much any simpleton and lunatic in between, really.
Wonder where the two current bidders fit in that scale?

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"CANT FIND WHAT YOUR LOOKING FOR"

October 7, 2011 – 11:30 am

“Wasp Metal Detector For spares or repair”

Does it make a buzzing sound whenever picnics are nearby?

“Was working well but just stopped, probably a minor fault, but no idea really.”

Ah, no buzzing sounds whatsoever then.
Ideal if you want to wander around, undisturbed, on coastlines and fields, but can’t be bothered with all that tedious digging malarkey, then.

“When working was simple to use, just two controls, Fine and Coarse tuning”

Is now even simpler to use, no tuning required.

“CANT FIND WHAT YOUR LOOKING FOR?
OR JUST NEED SOME TECHNICAL ADVICE ON PURCHASING?”

Here’s some advice if you can’t find what you’re looking for – Either you’re Bono or you should buy a working detector instead.

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HUMAN ERROR NEGLECT/MISUSE WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"spaire and repaire"

September 28, 2011 – 10:45 am

Forsooth! ’tis Hoopy once more, bearing yet further night soil peddlers seeking to hawk their fetid goods!
We are indeed indebted to you, Hoopy!

“The laptop is for spaire and repaire only , is faulty …. no returns accepted …”

Laptop? Alas, what strange words you speak, I understand not.
But Spaire and Repaire? A fyne traditionne indeede. Continue.

“The laptop was perfect working till get damaged ….”

Perchance you are the village fool?
Are not all things undamaged until they become damaged?
Where is thy bladder on a stick, fool?

“Display broken , need new display also the plastic cover from memory rams and fan its damaged , need changd …..”

Memory rams?
What wicked devilry is this?
Hast thou been making thyself known to the flocks in the fields?

“left henge cracked also”

It has a henge! A cracked henge but a henge, no less!

“but that dosent afect the oppening”

Nor dose it afect the rising or the setting of the sun any more.
Nor the changing of the seasons or the bounty of the harvest.
For, though once forged by the finest eastern druids, it has been handled like a bulls pizzle in the lumpen hands of a of a pictish dolt.

“the henge was broken from the begin and i use the laptop like that …. “

The henge was broken from the begin?
You take us for fools?
Perjurers, cutpurses and other wrongdoers spend time in the stocks – If you wish to avoid a similar fate I would advise you confess now that, being the beef-witted illiterate thou art, thou didst believe it to be a plough and used it thusly.

“Everythink is inside : 250 hard , 4 gb ram and others … come with battery and charger and his old battery wich hold 5 min on”

No, it’s no good, I cannot tolerate this shameful abuse of the english language any more.
Mine or yours.
I’m sorry, I’m going to have to stop before I’m seriously ill.

“The laptop was perfect working till get damaged …. no any future tests after that …”

Nnnngh! Stop it!

“READ THE DESCRIPTION BEFORE BIDDING !!! THANKS “

Yes, I did read it.
And that’s precisely why I’m not bidding.

“No returns
Happy Bidding !!!”

As opposed to No Bidding/Happy returns.

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WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"exceptional with cristal clear pictures"

September 23, 2011 – 10:45 am

“This television has been exceptional”

Hmmm…past tense, you notice?

“with cristal clear pictures and super suround sound reproduction UNTIL”

Dun dun DUUUUN!

“just recently when the picture started flicking and peoples faces changed to blue. I have been told it could be the crt and could be repairable?”

Or you could just be watching The Smurfs.

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WATER/LIQUIDS WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"water was dropped onto the iPad"

September 7, 2011 – 10:45 am


Oh dear, looks like the iPad floodgates have opened.

“Put together your laptop, iPod and iPhone – you get the dynamic Apple iPad.”

But what happens when you put together your laptop, iPod, iPhone and some water?
You get a somewhat less dynamic iPad, it would appear.
(That still can’t make phone calls, so why you’d add an iPhone into the mix to start with is anyone’s guess.)

“The Apple iPad, with a perfect blend of looks and performance is probably the only gadget you will ever need again”

Until they bring out a waterproof version, anyway.

“Apple iPad 16GB, water was dropped onto the iPad and it no longer powers on,”

Well, I suppose water’s better than the last one.”
It’s not just me that thinks that wording’s a bit off, is it?
It didn’t ‘get wet‘, it had ‘water dropped on it‘. Wonder how much?
A pallet-load? Was it moisture damage or impact damage?

“Has a few small dints to the back casing,”

Hmmm, we never saw the back of the previous one. Wonder if anyone thought to check that.
Maybe that was ok and could have been used as spares to fix this one?
That was £196 all in, ths one’s currently at £104, so that’s currently £300 for 2 broken ipads.
Providing no other lunatics start bidding.
How much is a brand new working one again?

“was working fine before the water damage.”

Apple has an app called Time Machine, don’t they?
Will that help in this instance?
Or do you still have to be able to travel back in time to before the damage tooke place in order to install it?

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SIGNIFICANT DISCOUNT TO ORIGINAL RRP WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"must just be something and nothing"

August 26, 2011 – 10:45 am

“This is a really nice TV from Samsung that was used im my bedroom but has now been upgraded to a 32 inch so is no longer needed.
Is in EXCELLENT condition.”

Really? Oh no, wait, here it comes.

“HERE IS THE PROBLEM………There is a intermittent fault;”

Figures.
Excellent condition apart from that though.

“Sometimes it will just swith off or just does not want to turn on, sometimes it is fine. This has happened a few times but to be honest the last time I turned it on, last week when taking the pictures for this ad it stayed on for over 3 hours before I actually turned if off! I have had it in a repair shop who said he couldn’t find anything wrong with it so must just be something and nothing.”

“Something and nothing.”
That’s the technical description of the fault, obviously.

“It cost over £340.00 new and has not really been used that much as it was only in the bedroom and must get switched on once or twice a week!”

And yet it still broke.

“If you win the bid the TV must be collected along with the cash within 3 days.”

You have to collect the TV and collect the cash? Now it’s sounding tempting.
How much cash are we talking about?
Oh, just £40 at the moment.
And a drive to Bradford to pick it up.
Not really sure that’s worth it, sorry.
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HUMAN ERROR NEGLECT/MISUSE WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"(SLIGHT FAULT)"

August 22, 2011 – 10:45 am


Reader “Kev” spotted this auction and felt we hadn’t had enough iPhones of late so sent it in. Thanks Kev!

“Phone was working great until tried and change the back cover to pink, as a result the touch screen doesnt work nor do the volune keys on the side”

Nice work. Brute force and ignorance strikes again.

“PHONE IS NOT BARRED”

But neither is it good , is it?
Sorry, that’s my Wenglish coming through there, isn’t it?

“The sim can holder is hard to get out but can be forced out”

Can be forced out. Well, that’s comforting to know.
I believe the back can be replaced in much the same way, by simply wrenching the screen off with all your might.
Followed by removing the remaining internal components with a melon-baller.

“Is in good condition few marks”

No visible bruising, you mean?

“No scammers”

Well that’ll certainly scare them off.

“PLEASE NOTE: WHILE I AIM TO GET EVERYTHING CORRECT, AT TIMES MISTAKES CAN HAPPEN OR PROBLEMS CAN OCCUR”

Like the touchscreen not working, you mean?

“IN THE EVENT OF THIS PLEASE CONTACT ME SO I CAN SORT THE ISSUE.”

Or, failing that, to try and sell it. That’ll solve the problem.

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WATER/LIQUIDS WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"I cannot say what else is wrong with it "

August 18, 2011 – 11:30 am

“The phone was in great working order until it got wet.”

One of these days someone will invent a phone made with insoluble parts.
Until then, insoluble faults will have to do.

“The phone wouldnt switch on so I changed the battery and now it switches on (only when plugged in) but is stuck in recovery mode.”

Good job changing that battery.
Wonder what they changed it for?

“It restores successfully then goes back to saying its in recovery mode.”

Not sure that counts as ‘restored succesfully’ then.

“Things to note about the phone:”

It’s broken?

“1, Stuck in recovery mode”

Close enough I suppose.

“2, Screen is dim and only vidible in bright light”

Vidible? Are you a droog from Clockwork Orange?

“3, Some screws missing thanks to one of my kids knocking the table when changing the battery.”

Oh well, there’d probably have been some left over afterwards anyway, wouldn’t there?

“4, Damage on corner near power button after small drop (works fine)”

The small drop works fine, that’s good to know.
At least they didn’t break the laws of gravity.

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NEGLECT/MISUSE WATER/LIQUIDS WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"Excellent pre accident condition."

August 4, 2011 – 12:30 pm

“Excellent pre accident condition.”

Yes, as they so often are.
I’d wager it was in mint condition when it left the factory.

“Daughter sprayed screen with water so now screen faulty.”

Well, that’s new one at least.
Who need a wii when a mouthful of water will suffice?

“NB – WE ARE AWAY ON HOLIDAY FROM THE 30TH UNTIL THE 6TH AUGUST”

TRANSLATION – BURGLARS! Please come and take this so we can claim for a replacement on the house insurance when we get back.
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DISTURBING WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"I think it's motherboard fold."

August 3, 2011 – 12:30 pm


This one’s from “Hoopy”
Thanks Hoopy!

“Here for sale my girlfriend laptop.”

Obviously the seller really loved this laptop once, but that feeling’s since faded and his eye’s been caught by a younger, sprightlier new model?
Or did this ‘girlfriend laptop’ cheat on him in some way?

“About 3 years old.”

[Gary Glitter joke goes here]

“Its was work fine, but before a few days it’s stop working.”

Anyone able to work out what the hell this is supposed to mean?
I think that’s a tick in the “Worked until broke” box, but am unsure.

“Lights coming but screen is dark.”

Lights are on but nobody’s home?

“I think it’s motherboard fold.”

You really shouldn’t be folding the motherboard, you know that?

“Laptop in super good condition, looks like a new ( no any scratches, see photos )”

Like a new what?

“This laptop was used very careful, just for e-mails, and read news.”

SELLER HAS NOT LOOKED AT ANY PORN ON THIS LAPTOP.

“So, it’s will be very nice for some body, who can fix motherboard, or just for spare, because is no ANY SCRATCHES, AND LIKE A NEW!!!!.”

Or anyone who enjoys sloppy seconds.

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