Category Archives: UNKNOWN INCIDENT

HUMAN ERROR NEGLECT/MISUSE UNKNOWN INCIDENT WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"i tried to repair but broke it"


(This beauty sent in by “MiltonsStapler”, heaven only know what he was looking for in order to find this.)

“Windows had stopped working, so i tried to repair but broke it.”

Never a good sign when you manage to break hardware when trying to fix software

“The dvdrom had also stopped working, so i removed it,”

O-kaaaayyyy…I suppose if it’s broken you might as well…

“and so had to rip the keyboard off.”

…but not like that, surely?

“It does not power on, but used to, so maybe the battery is dead.
The screen is intact.”

Didn’t smash the screen to bits trying to remove the battery, then?

“Sorry no returns.”

Y’know, I’m not sure you are sorry.
The ‘successful’ bidder, who won this for £34.68 (plus p&p), now THEY might know the meaning of the word…
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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"It hasn't been dropped or stood on. I just went to turn it on one morning and it was like this"

broken-kindle

Tooth fairy dropped her sack on it? Are you SURE you didn’t get up for a wee in the night?

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HUMAN ERROR NEGLECT/MISUSE UNKNOWN INCIDENT WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"Tinkering fan might be able to sort socket out."

“TAPE PLAYER IS DEAD
RADIO WORKS ONLY
AUDIO SOCKET IS SENSITIVE TO MOVEMENT”

So, unable to play cassettes and you can’t move about while you’re listening to it.
Not really much of a Walkman, is it?

“Worked fine until recently.”

One of these days we’ll find an auction that ticks ALL the category boxes.
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DISTURBING NEGLECT/MISUSE UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"FREDDIE the LAUGHING BEAR"

laughing-teddy-bear

Sorry, Freddie, you’re going on the fire in the garden lest you infect the others. Last time we had a mohair mange outbreak this severe, we lost eight bears, two pandas and a hippo.

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"THIS IS MY OWN PERSONAL ITEM FOR SALE, I AM A PRIVATE INDIVIDUAL AND I DO NOT TRADE IN THESE ITEMS AND AS SUCH THIS IS A PRIVATE TRANSACTION BETWEEN ME AND THE BUYER, AND DOES NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH NDC-UK (NDC.CO.UK LTD) "

dvd-drive-spares

Your own personal item? Your own personal 750 Blu-ray and DVD drives?

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"some of them might have plastics missing and they are on all sort of conditions"

job-lot-remotes

“Imagine my surprise upon looking down the back of the sofa”

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"THEES ALL PRINTERS UNTESTED BUT AM SALLING SPARES OR REPAIRS"

kyocera printer

50! Never buy a Kyocera printer seems to be the subtext here.

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"JUST STOPPED HEATING FOOD UP THE OTHER DAY"

broken-matsui

Maybe try marketing it as a fully-working potato rotator then? People will always need their potatoes rotating.

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UNKNOWN INCIDENT

"Comes with protector case"

iphone-smashed

Protector case review: Does not work. 1/10.

Or perhaps the seller was temporarily going “bareback” for a quick thrill and this is the inevitable consequence.

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NEGLECT/MISUSE UNKNOWN INCIDENT WATER/LIQUIDS

"Keyboard For Keys"

“Multiple keys missing”

Wonder how that happened?

“keyboard badly bent.”

Oh. That would probably do it.

“Keyboard is sold as untested and is not guaranteed to work”

Guaranteed to not even be able to spell “work”.
Maybe “ork”, if you’re lucky.

“can be used for key replacments”

Or for Scrabble spares.

“Item is for Spares/Repairs, possible liquid damage present”

Oh, just for good measure.

“Please note pictures are for reference only and may not be the exact item you receive, however the item will be exactly as described.”

So, it might actually have a W key.
But may be missing a multitude of others you might want.
Still, if you’re desperate for those 4 points, maybe an upside M key would suffice?
If that’s included.

“Warranty does not cover goods lost or damage in transit if the item has been lost or damaged in the post”

How would you tell?
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