Category Archives: RAGE

NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE RAGE

“IN NEED OF RESTORATION WITH MISSING EARS”

That’s not a problem. Ears are a relatively small part of a teddy’s makeup. Surely any generic stock replacement teddy bear ears will fill the gap and return this to its prime. A few minutes sewing on some cheap standard off-the-shelf bear ears and he’ll be completely…

mickey-mouse

Ah. You want trademarked Mickey Mouse ears? They’re £125 each, mate, plus import duty, plus the proprietary Velcro Mickey Mouse Ear Fixings needed to attach them to the non-standard ear latches. Probably best writing this one off and giving it to the dog to hump around the garden, like the dead mole it is.

[View auction]

HIJINKS HUMAN ERROR NEGLECT/MISUSE NEVER WORKED IN THE FIRST PLACE RAGE

"I have tried to change one of the pieces by hitting it with a hammer"

play-centre-hammer

That swing looks too high as well. Did you have to make the rope “fit” with a knife? And should it be sitting over concrete slabs like that? We’re no experts in child safety, but we can imagine seeing this scene in black and white in a local newspaper, two days after some sort of head/neck/spine tragedy has unfolded.

[View auction]

NEGLECT/MISUSE RAGE WORKED UNTIL BROKE

"Our little boy hit it with a toy"

Samsung-UE40D5520-broken

The trick is to bend one of their fingers back as far as it will go if the child looks like going near the TV screen. They soon learn. You can make them cry simply by turning to the TV pages of the Argos catalogue after a few “lessons.”

[View auction]

NEGLECT/MISUSE RAGE

"NONE OF THE ITEMS IN THIS LOT ARE NI WORKING CONDITION!"

controller-s-broken

We got through quite a few game controllers during our formative, more aggressive years, when every failure to complete a “level” was accompanied by a frustrated whimper, sometimes even a self-inflicted dead leg, and the controller, or the “stick of joy” as they used to be known, flying through the air from the frustration of having some 8-bit brain defeating us time and time again.

But we knew the value of things. The controller would fly through the air towards the sofa or the pillow. That’s the difference. Kids today know they can have another one tomorrow and won’t be told they have to wait until Christmas. So they can throw them at the brick work. Nasty little shits.

But 26?

[View auction]

DISTURBING NEGLECT/MISUSE RAGE

"…part limb missing chewed hand"

blonde-doll-pile-up

The photographer had a little bit too much fun taking these shots. Picture #4 is bordering on the NSFW.

[View auction]

NEVER WORKED IN THE FIRST PLACE RAGE

"GREAT BUNDLE FOR SOMEONE!"

xbox-controllers

Well, if we imagine there’s an infinite number of people out there with an infinite number of differing technological requirements, then yes, we have to assume there will indeed be a person for whom 37 broken, third-party, first-generation Xbox controllers is a DREAM COME TRUE.

[View auction]

NEGLECT/MISUSE RAGE UNKNOWN INCIDENT WATER/LIQUIDS

"CAGE LAPTOPS"

Conflicted feelings today: Happy because we have a submission from “Ian” (Thanks Ian!), but sad because it’s brought this sad state of affairs to our attention.
Won’t somebody please stop this cruel trade in cage-fighting laptops?

“WE ARE OFFERING A CAGE OF 100 LAPTOPS”

No thanks, I’ll stick with free-range ones.

“WE RECEIVE APPROXIMATELY 200 UNITS PER DAY READY FOR SALE.”

By “Ready for sale”, I assume you mean “Ready for the bin”?
Or they’re ready for sale before you put them in cages to fight it out, then sell what’s left afterwards?

“DAMAGE VARIES ON UNITS. SOME POWER UP, OTHERS HAVE BROKEN SCREENS, A FEW MAY HAVE LIQUID DAMAGE.”

And some have had fluorescent tubes or folding chairs smashed over them?
That’s a few different categories ticked then.

“THERE IS NO GUARANTEE AS TO WHAT YOU MAY RECEIVE.”

Oh, I think you’ll find there is.
Guaranteed tat.

View Auction

NEGLECT/MISUSE RAGE UNKNOWN INCIDENT WATER/LIQUIDS


Obviously, serial submitter “Hoopy” is feeling their territory is being threatened and is fluffing up their chest feathers and strutting about the place squawking

“See your iPod and raise you an iPad”.

I’ve got cockerels like that.
As long as Hoopy doesn’t start pecking any of the other submitters and getting on the roof of my shed I think we’ll be ok.

Apparently,

“It’s been dropped and damaged.”

Dropped and damaged?
Damaged as a result of the drop or just damaged as well, for good measure?
And as Hoopy wondered,

“Dropped onto what, and from what height?”

Obviously, your guess is a good as mine but I’d suspect it was with some force to bend the casing like that.
Think that’s good enough for me to tick the rarely-used “Rage” category.

“It does not seem to power on when plugged in.”

Really? Well that’s surprising.

“It does not include the original box or software and does not include the charger. “

Of course it doesn’t. They were probably sold separately, after all.
Or maybe they burnt up on re-entry to the earth’s atmosphere?
I mean, it was dropped from Low Earth Orbit, wasn’t it?

“There may be dents, scratches, or scuffs that don’t show up well in the photos.”

Is that because they’re hidden underneath all the other dents and cracks?
I don’t think you really need to worry about the unseen damage, I would have thought the damage you can see in the pictures would be enough to put you off. Having said that, it doesn’t seem to have deterred the 4 bidders so far.

“It is possible that this item has been exposed to liquid.”

Oh, just to make sure, eh?

View Auction