Category Archives: PROBABLY FIXABLE

PROBABLY FIXABLE

"VEIWING ENCORAGE AND WELLCOME"

broken-mower

Three out of four words wrong in one sentence. And in Comic Sans as big as it’ll go. Slow clap. Such a slow clap that my hands still haven’t touched together yet. Still haven’t. Still haven’t.

*Clap*

Thanks to Hoopy for finding this monstrosity.

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PROBABLY FIXABLE SIGNIFICANT DISCOUNT TO ORIGINAL RRP

"In the market for some cheap gold?, patient enough to test and unbend Pins?"

cpus-4-gold

Is that a thing people do now? Scavenging gold out of broken processors, like modern, nerdy, hunched-over-a-computer-desk rag & bone men?

To answer our own question, yes it is and it appears to be quite the grim task.

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HUMAN ERROR PROBABLY FIXABLE

"WOULD MAKE A NICE WALL ORNIMENT"

accordion-wall-covering

(a) No it wouldn’t, it’s an accordion. It’s a significantly three-dimensional object, so it’d be like sticking a cardboard box to your wall. The space beneath would be rendered void, plus you’d need good rawlplugs or to get lucky and find a bit of timber due to the weight.

(b) ORNAMENT. You managed to get accordion right but messed up ornament? Some people have the oddest brains.

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PROBABLY FIXABLE

"COMPLETE APART FROM HARD DRIVE & MEMORY. NO CHARGER."

dell-latitude-d505-brokeneded

So that’s no hard drive, no memory and no charger. Complete apart from the missing things torn out to protect the photograph collection of the original owner.

“1 KEY MISSING ON KEYBOARD”

And no “J” on the keyboard, although that’s hardly a big deal. Would suit person not called John.

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NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE

"SANTA'S ARMS DO NOT MOVE THIS MAY BE DUE TO IT BEING LOCKED IN PLACE DO NOT KNOW WHY "

moving-santa

Not only selling a broken Santa, but selling it in the middle of May for the lowest possible impact. We don’t know much about “SEO” and its workings, but suspect May is one of the slowest months in terms of people putting “Christmas figure” into search boxes.

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NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE

"THE SCREW ON THE LEFT SIDE NEEDS TIGHTENING UP WHICH CAN EASILY BE DONE WITH ONE OF THOSE TINY SCREWDRIVERS"

rayban-wayfarer-brokeded

And the most important part needs a large amount of fixing from a professional with one of those very big lens-making machines, unless you happen to have a lazy right eye that needs toughening up.

Do children still have lazy eyes these days, or is that sort of thing all fixed with a jab at birth now? It’s been a while since I last saw a poor, poor child having stones thrown at it because it had a plaster over half of its glasses.

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NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE

"Tandem Bike For Restoration Project"

tandem-restoration
Where lies the dividing line between “restoration” and simply building an entire thing yourself by sourcing and assembling the entirety of its components?
Could you legitimately “restore” the Titanic after buying a small bit of recovered bannister from James Cameron then building it up from there?
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NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE SIGNIFICANT DISCOUNT TO ORIGINAL RRP

"One black standard one and a grey one with the loop and two metal extendable rods and has a booster dial"

job-lot-electricals

This is what our lives will amount to. This is the debris we will leave behind. Our children will pillage it for spare power leads and fuses, then sell the rest for a pittance. We should keep the boxes, so they can sell it for a little more.

The lights on that stupid Philips TV box will outlast us all 🙁

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DISTURBING NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE

"ideal for restoration project/kids playroom/sewing room"

caravan-slaughterhouse

If you put children in there, it won’t be long until the council put them somewhere else entirely and legally stop you from contacting them until they turn 18. And even then it’ll only be in 30-minute sessions once a month under the supervision of a court-appointed specialist.

“1980s retro model in attractive grey and white (faded)”

Also, will there ever be a time when anything from the 1980s is considered “retro” and in any way desirable?

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HIJINKS NEGLECT/MISUSE PROBABLY FIXABLE

"YOU ARE BIDDING ON WHAT IS IN THE PHOTO"

Steampunk Mrs Davros
Well, I guess if she could carry the thing upstairs without scuffing the walls then she could be worth £9.99.
Though I suppose if she turns out to be a steampunk Dalek then stairs won’t be a problem.
Exterminations could be a problem. But not stairs.

“old wooden blanket box needs ome work”

I’m not going anywhere near the “old box needs some work” gags.
Have to leave something to go in the comments field, after all.

“34.35..37.38.40.41”

Those are some very strange measurements…

“I will post over seas but please contact me for costs and also I will not be responsible for any breakages items will be pack securely and bubble wrapped”

With or without airholes?

“I will post over seas but please contact me for costs and also I will not be r
Eesponsible for any breakages items will be pack securely and bubble wrapped

Okay, okay, we heard you the first time. When it was all spelled and formatted correctly.
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